I have found that the hard thing about Black love is that a good portion of our relationships are spent overcoming the condition of distrust and the subconscious feelings of unworthiness put in us by society. Fatin and I were extremely naive when we started out, acting out roles that we thought represented a good marriage: husband as provider, nurturing wife, agreed upon spiritual beliefs.

Although those things are important, it took like ten minutes to realize the intellectual and emotional heft needed to stay married were in a different galaxy from where we were.  Our desire to stay married made us challenge our limits on patience, humility, compassion, forgiveness and maturity.

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